I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
They took my balls.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
