Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
