She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
