remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
