Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
