Don't you send me to vm
Having a random hookup so left but love u
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize
