Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Randomize
