I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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