Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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