professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Vodka?
Forever.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Please don't give away my fajitas
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
