this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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