1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
And my parents said I crawled through the house
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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