I just made out with a guy for $7.
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
