I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
