I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
