No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
