no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
