I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
