I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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