is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
