He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
This is my gift to your gina
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
