Already got asked if we're dating
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
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