you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
