Already got asked if we're dating
I'm eating all of the evidence.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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