Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize