try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
