he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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