Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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