Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
