I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
