I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Come share oat with me in your robe
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Randomize
