I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize