It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
i now understand why vodka
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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