I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize