Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I CAN MOONWALK!
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize