I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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