Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
no you cant smoke seaweed
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
