i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Barsexuality is the new black.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
