i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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