I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
