Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
