I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize