he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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