you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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