I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
