Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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