At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
