Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize