GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
