either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
