Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
That accounts for only three of the penises
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
